S U M M E R

Dinner with the girls or with Neil. I needed to talk to the girls about the conversation I’d just had with Neil, but Big Daddy was waiting for me at the airport. I looked around my room, not even sure where to start or how to start. Neil had thrown a curveball, and it changed everything for me in a matter of seconds. I was so annoyed because this trip with big daddy was going to be the best one yet, and he would be letting me use up his credit card.

My first mind, though, was to make sure that I got my clients closed out. I secured the information on my laptop before I did anything else. Sitting there, I closed up some pink accounts that I had been working on earlier in the day. Once I was finished, I locked my computer and then shut it down. I had grown accustomed to doing that, and my line of business, in case, for some reason, I forgot to shut it down. At the very least, it would be locked since it contained sensitive financial information.

Back to Neil. Three years of working with him, and I never got the idea that he liked me… Or even loved me. That sounded so… unreal. What the hell was he doing loving me? Someone who only cared about herself, who stayed out of real relationships, and who would rather be a taker. Was his ass slow? I would chew him up and spit him out.

Well, maybe I would swal–

I looked at my work phone ringing in my hand and was not surprised to see that it was my general manager. I hesitated to answer the call, but I knew it was probably important if he was calling me after 8 pm.

“Lance?” I questioned, moving about my room to close up work stuff and pack my suitcase. I was going with Big Daddy.

“I need you on this, Summer. There’s a big client calling me in twenty minutes, and if I secure this, it means a big payday.”

“Lance, I’m literally packing for my trip, practically out the door.”

I walked over to the closet and pulled out an outfit I’d sewn together two months ago. It was time to finally wear it.

“Six hundred million,” Lance stated.

I stopped in my tracks, stilling as the number registered in my head. Our company was on the smaller side, but we managed big accounts. The goal of course was to go higher, but it worked.

“Say yes, Summer, please,” he begged. I groaned, dropping the outfit on the bed.

Beeping in my ear, let me know that I had a call on the other line. When I pulled the phone away from my face to check to see who was calling, I was surprised to see Neil’s name.

“Why is the universe doing this to me?” I complained.

“So, that’s a yes?”

“Yes,” I said, not hesitating any longer. Big Daddy would understand, and Neil would just have to wait. I didn’t even know what to say back to him.

“Fuck, yes! You’re the best CFO ever. I should buy you a damn UFO.”

“Lance, please,” I laughed at the CEO of Bank Next Financial. He was about his money, annoying, and corny.

“I’ll call you once I hear. Give me an hour.”

After hanging up with him, I just continued packing my suitcase, just in case. I sent Big Daddy a text to let him know that I would be a little late. He sent back “okay” emojis followed by $2,000. I didn’t even flinch because I was so used to him doing that. He knew I wasn’t coming. He still sent me my allowance.

That was daily at that.

My phone rang again, and I half expected it to be Lance, but it was Neil. I wasn’t even sure what to say to him. He’d confessed feelings I didn’t think I shared, but he was too nice for that. I couldn’t lead him on and break his heart. Well, this would probably do some damage, but it was better to break it without being involved at all.

The knock on my door is what really fucked me up. I wasn’t expecting anyone to be at my door, but it was probably Big Daddy coming to check up on me. He had a way of crossing the boundaries that he set sometimes, and showing up at my house like that would be one of those boundaries being broken.

I turned to the door, confused, and before I could answer it, my phone started ringing.

“Fuck!” I hollered, annoyed by everything because I was trying to do so much. My anxiety was everywhere, and I wanted to scream some more.

I went back to snatch the phone off the table. I wasn’t immune to horror movies where the girl always walked away from the phone to answer the door, and the person on the phone was trying to warn her about who was at the door.

“Yes?” I answered.

“We got it!” Lance cheerfully said.

“Yay, great. My trip is canceled.”

“You can start it on Monday. Enjoy your trip, Summer.”

“Oh, perfect! Thanks, Lance.” I hung and cheered to myself as I rushed to get things into my suitcase.

The doorbell rang again. “Shit. Focus, Summer.”

I ran back to the door, putting on my cheeriest face for Big Daddy. Hopefully, it was a trip that he could rebook. I needed to get away from the house, from work, from—

“Neil?” I questioned once the door was open.

“I came to apologize. I don’t know what I was thinking. Probably made you uncomfortable and shit. Those weren’t my intentions. We were friends, so hopefully we can just go back to being that.”

I stared at him, thinking about how we had been friends for such a long time. We were closer than the average coworker, but that was mainly because there were like ten of us in the building that could withstand the sun. Neil having feelings for me wasn’t too far-fetched, but it just didn’t make sense. I didn’t feel like I gave off that type of energy, but he somehow found something that slipped through the cracks.

N E I L

Staring at Summer, I had to get what I was feeling off of my chest. I couldn’t stand there and act like I said wasn’t left field when I’d been interested in her sense I met her. She just had this way about her that said she wasn’t interested in me, but I felt she was. Her acting shocked and surprised about my confession wasn’t fooling me, but I wanted to make sure I apologized.

However, I couldn’t walk away from her.

“You accomplish something, and Im the first person you call. We work together, take trips together, even play each other’s dates when needed. You call to make sure I ate on game days, and you stare at me. Intensely.”

“Okay…?” she scrunched up her face. “I’m just an intense bitch,” she continued.

“Yeah, you’re a bitch sometimes, intense too, but you’re not fooling me.”

“Neil, seriously. Be for real right now? I’m literally packing a bag to go on a trip with Cade right now. Don’t you think if I felt something, I would’ve already addressed it?” she was getting frustrated with me, but it was a mask for the anxiety she felt.

I knew she wasn’t anxious about it the moment her breathing changed when the words left my mouth earlier. She was always on this tired read about how she would never fall in love, and she would just have transactional relationships, but to know that someone felt something serious for her was scary to her. I knew that because we had gotten so close that she had shared all kinds of things with me. It was like sometimes she forgot that she told me so much.

I would admit that I was okay for a while just being her friend. It wasn’t until a few weeks ago that my best friend pointed out that I didn’t do anything with her that I did with him. This was his way of saying that she was more than just a best friend because I was ‘tender’ about her. There were things that I would run to her and tell her before I told him, and he said that’s how he always knows when I am serious about a girl. Although it had been three or four years since the last time I was in a serious relationship.

I guess for me, it was because she was always around. It really didn’t give me a chance to take dating seriously because she was feeling that intimate void that you get when you're single. So, with the rest, that was just for sex because I obviously wasn’t doing that with her.

But I knew, and my blabbermouth finally caught up with me, and the words came spilling out about how much I felt for and loved her. Now she was trying to run away from me.

The guy she was going on the trip with was just some sugar daddy that she came across. I’ve heard all the stories about their getaways and the type of money he sent her. I knew that I wasn’t that kind of rich, but I would do my best to make sure she was okay if she had me. It wasn’t lost on me that Summer had expensive taste or that she was this fashionista-diva below all the nerdy financial stuff.

I loved everything about the woman and had been sitting on the bench for far too long. Telling her how I felt made me feel free from the restraint of pretending like I was just being a friend when I wanted so much more. But it also made me feel anxious myself because I knew that she was going to start acting weird. It was like her anxiety rubbed off on me sometimes.

I felt connected to her. Maybe I was tripping or maybe I was too far gone about her. Shit, maybe I just knew what the fuck I wanted, and it was finally time for me to get it.

“I don’t see how you don’t see it. The way we cuddle up and watch movies, the way you take my facial care more seriously than me. When you’re sad, happy, PMSing, complaining another dates and horniness… you call me. Am I just sitting on the other side of the phone wishing you find what you’re looking for in another man? Fuck no, Sum. I picture me being that for you.”

I watched her squirm. So, I continued. “You want some money? I got that. You want a new bag or need new tires? I can take care of you. Need some dick? Sum, I swear I’ll fold ya lil ass into a pretzel and give you all the dick you want. Just say that’s what you want for real, and I’ll give it to you.

“If this changes our friendship, I’m sorry. I just can’t sit on these feelings anymore. I want you, and I want you bad. You just gotta let me know if you want it bad too, Sum. I’m not gonna bother you about it anymore. Enjoy your trip.”

Leaving her at her door, I made it to my car. I sat in the seat for a minute or two before I crunk it up and backed out of the driveway. There was nothing left to say. I wanted to leave it with an apology and let her be, but she deserved to know. If she didn’t return the feelings genuinely, then I would let it go.

Summer was a lot of things at once, but she was beautiful inside and out, no matter how tough she tried to act. She was Milton’s youngest daughter, so she was a spoiled brat by everyone, including me. I just wanted the brat to myself. Me, a grown ass thirty-six-year-old man who refers to a grown ass woman as a brat. Sometimes, I wanted to fuck her attitude outta her and fuck her anxiety away. The life she lived was busy, but she could find some ease with me.

I stopped to grab some Curry’s Pasta and made it home thirty minutes later. In my driveway, Summer leaned up against her blacked-out Mercedes. I got out of the car, grabbed the food, and walked up to her. She had her hands stuffed in her jacket pockets, and she was looking down at her toes before she brought her attention up to me. We locked eyes for a moment, and I gave her the floor to say what needed to be said. I had said enough, and it was now up to her. I had to admit, though, that I was kind of excited because if she’d come all the way to my house and beat me here, then she must’ve had some news that would make me happy.

“I just need some time to think about it, if that’s okay.”

“Why did you come here then and not text that?” I asked, setting the food on the hood of my car. I stepped closer to her.

“I felt like you deserved to have me tell you that face-to-face.”

“Is that all?” I gazed at her, taking in her slender frame, chocolate frame. She was perfect, and I didn’t want anyone else playing with what I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

“I also just kinda wanted to know…” she mumbled something.

“Speak up, Sum,” I requested.

“Just wanted a hug?” she lied.

I looked into her eyes, searching for answers to questions I’d had all day. When I finally found the answer to one, I placed my hands on either side of her face as I brought my lips down to hers. It was like her body melted in my hands immediately as she kissed me back. All of the fronting she was doing had gone out the window, and she felt like she was mine. But I knew her, and she needed to seriously think this through before she went any further. I’d still, however, enjoy her lips in the meantime. She needed to feel what I felt for her and know that I wasn’t trying to play games with her. I would take the opportunity to make her mine in a heartbeat if she just let me.

She had to just let me.